Believe the Gospel

"And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those whom he predestined he also called, and those whom he called he also justified, and those whom he justified he also glorified.
What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?" (Romans 8:28-32)

Just last weekend I was invited to a banquet to celebrate God’s goodness to the students who took part in the Medical Strategic Network’s (MSN’s) month-long intensive training course. These 34 students had come from around the world to learn how to live as Jesus’ followers in their vocations as health professionals, with a special emphasis on sharing the Gospel with patients.

MSN so profoundly & positively influenced my life & practice of medicine during my own training, that for the past few years I gladly accepted the honor of having their students shadow me in my clinic. To God’s glory, many students & staff expressed their appreciation for what they learned from me, but in past years I wasn’t able to attend to their celebration banquets. Not only was this year to be my first chance to attend the banquet, but I was also asked to be among a few staff who would give concluding remarks -- a special charge to the departing students.

It didn't take long for me to think of what to share. My own soul has been so dry of late, it was a message I knew I myself needed to hear -- I was probably the one who needed to hear it the most. I wanted this message to penetrate my own heart, & I also hoped it would be something that would encourage the students to see life with simple, Biblical perspective.

As I followed three spiritual giants up to the podium, I of so little faith gave the following charge [edited for clarity]:

Over the past weeks you have learned much about the Gospel: how to live it, & how to share it. My charge to you this evening is something that I'm sure undergirds & intertwines with so much of all that you've learned these weeks that it seems obvious, but it's still worth emphasizing lest it gets lost in all the shuffle: BELIEVE the Gospel!

As you head away from Redlands in the next days you will face many temptations that will oppose everything that you've learned here:

- You will have residents & other superiors who will tell you to "HURRY UP," to "leave out that religious stuff."

- Someone in your family will question your decisions to serve the underserved here & around the world.

- There will even be the very rare patient who will totally misunderstand your intentions as you extend spiritual care.

In these moments & always, BELIEVE THE GOSPEL! At every moment, PREACH it to yourself! TRUST in the fact that in Christ, God has given you all things (Romans 8:32)!

When Satan & his demons put idols before you to worship,

When the world tries to squeeze you into its mold, & tells you you're not good enough,

When your own flesh cries out for you to puff up with pride or even wallow in self-pity,

BELIEVE...THE...GOSPEL!

-----------------------------

The words still ring inside my head. Believe the Gospel? Is the Gospel really for frequent-failers like me? Hallelujah! It is EXACTLY for sinners like me. Thank You, Jesus...

[For whoever might be reading this, I'd still appreciate your prayers, primarily that I would abide by the charge I shared, that I would be diligent in surrender, that I would indeed BELIEVE the Good News of Jesus. Thanks.]

"I will hope in Him"

"But this I call to mind,
and therefore I have hope:
The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases;
his mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
'The LORD is my portion,' says my soul,
'therefore I will hope in him.'" (Lamentations 3:21-24)It had been nearly three years since I last wore scrubs. Three weeks ago, I was wearing them again at four-something in the morning as I drove away from home to head in for duty. I knew it was going to be dark again by the time I got home that night -- it was going to be a very long day.

But I was excited that dark & early morning; I'd been looking forward to that day with a special sense of hope & excitement. I was going to Mexico for a medical mission trip!

In one sense, I wasn't doing anything new. From my first cross-cultural mission experience nearly 14 years ago onward, God had blessed me with many mission trips to Mexico -- too many to count. Several of those trips included medical ministry, & I'd certainly been involved in various mission efforts in farther, more difficult-to-reach, & more difficult-to-adapt-to places. This day-trip to a bordertown in Mexico wasn't supposed to be a big deal at all.

But it WAS a big deal to me: it was the first time I'd even considered cross-cultural missions in a long time. Since I'd screwed up in life with such colossal consequences, in some ways I felt that missions was now out of my league, something I couldn't even think about doing anymore.

God wouldn't let go of me though, & He was slowly reminding me of the vastness of His love, that it was more than enough to cover my sin. For the past two years I marvelled at how God still chose to use me in my practice to share His goodness with my patients despite my own sin & brokenness before Him. Growing within me was a confidence in Jesus' love for me, that He would always want to use me to share Him with others. Then I found out about a special opportunity through my work for this trip to Mexico. As I applied, I was candid with the leadership about my current situation, & I also shared with them my desire to re-learn firsthand God's care for all peoples. I was glad to know that they still welcomed me to join them.

The whole trip was a very, very big blessing to me. The blessing wasn't anything flashy or glamorous (none of the ills I treated were life-threatening, I saw fewer patients than I'd expected, & there was even a makeshift laboratory available to us in the tent across from ours), but rather that God would deign to use little old me -- a man of shamefully little faith -- to serve His kingdom among my poor brothers & sisters of Tijuana. Claudia (the Nicaraguan-American nurse/translator assigned to me) & I were able to bless many of our patients as we shared God's truth & prayed with them.

Another special blessing was to work quietly alongside people who were on their first mission trip, to see their excitement at God's unfolding the new horizon of cross-cultural service before them. Their joy & enthusiasm for Jesus were blessedly infectious! Yet another bonus blessing was the chance to eat authentic Mexican tacos (including tripe tacos -- yum, yum)!

I wish I could write that my life of late has been one of steady growth & faith, but there remain a lot of ups & downs. Sometimes I lament at where I'm "supposed to be" had I not been so foolish & rebellious: at this point I would have been completing language school in preparation for a mission hospital post in Niger. I had thought that the next time I'd be in scrubs would be in Africa (I originally limited myself to out-patient clinic work in order to have predictable time to prepare to go overseas). I'm saddened to think how far I'd gone "off" course.

But I find that it is exactly at these times of disappointment & despondency, that I myself am in need of the Gospel most. The Gospel reminds me of God's sovereign, loving rule over even all my mistakes. It reminds me that Jesus' sacrifice was more than sufficient to pay for my sin, & promises to change me from within. And, it reminds me that I am indeed where I'm supposed to be... humbly accepting His lavish love as He guides me through life one day at a time.

God willing, I'd like to take more of these short mission trips. I look forward to the day when Jadon will be able to join me, the day when he & his daddy would be able to serve God side by side not only locally but also in a foreign land. But whether Jadon & I will ever be able to serve together overseas or not, my deepest prayer for him is that he will know this all-redeeming God who is worthy of all our worship.

"Oh sing to the LORD a new song;
sing to the LORD, all the earth!
Sing to the LORD, bless his name;
tell of his salvation from day to day.
Declare his glory among the nations,
his marvelous works among all the peoples!
For great is the LORD, and greatly to be praised;
he is to be feared above all gods.
For all the gods of the peoples are worthless idols,
but the LORD made the heavens.
Splendor and majesty are before him;
strength and beauty are in his sanctuary." (Psalm 96:1-6)

By Grace Alone

Dearest Saints & Beloved Friends:

How are you? I pray you have been doing well. I know it’s been a long time since I talked to many of you. I’m sorry that I failed to answer those of you who wrote to ask me how I was doing. In many ways, I felt I couldn’t answer… at first I felt I lacked either the words or the energy to reply in any meaningful way. When the words & energy were there, I needed to concentrate on talking with my family & church body.

As I write this letter, I pray that it will help you to understand what’s been going on in my life. Though some of the news I have to share with you is bad news, I hope you don’t mind if I start with the good news.

Dear Friends, I’m a father! Just over four months ago, my son Jadon Mackay Wu was born: 6 pounds, 1.5 ounces & 19 inches long (including his temporary cone-head). With the help of a very loving & dedicated breastfeeding mother, he has grown into a VERY healthy & happy, chubby double-chinned boy who loves to babble, giggle, & smile at interesting faces. In fact, he hasn’t yet met a face he didn’t like! He’s long mastered head control, uses kicking movements to inch around the bed, & looks ready to turn himself over any day now.

I tell you it is amazing to hold this young child in my arms & gaze into his face. Even though I care for him nearly every day, I’m not sure I fully believe it yet: “I’m a father?! This is my son?!” Yet I’m thankful beyond words to see him grow before me. And as I feel Jadon’s warmth when he sleeps on my chest…WOW! What a precious gift from our Heavenly Father (Psalm 127:3)!

It’s hard to understand why God would be so gracious to me, a horrible sinner, to give me such a beautiful son. It’s hard to realize, too, that there remain a whole lot of agony & turmoil in the lives of Jadon’s mother & me, that our sin of fornication was only one of many issues that yet keep us from being able to pursue marriage. These many issues are ones we are barely beginning to recognize & address as we seek pastoral counseling. Perhaps there are others we haven’t even discovered yet. One thing is for certain: sin makes our issues (including other sins) far more complicated.

Most of you know that for many years I was preparing to serve overseas as a medical missionary. In fact, I had become appointed by three different mission boards, & everything was set for me to work in a hospital in West Africa. Many of you were very supportive of this pursuit. Everything was ready…almost.

Everything was ready…except my heart. The final push toward mission preparation (May 2005 onward) was, in fact, during an acutely painful & confusing season of my life. I decided to go forward with missions anyway since I knew that it had always clearly been my goal & that our God was certainly deserving of my love & service. My prayer letters at the time showed glimpses of strength & trust in God. But slowly, I became proud & self-centered. I started to concentrate on my own selfish ideas of what I needed, & in my terrible self-pity I disregarded our God’s holy laws. Particularly in my relationship with Jadon’s mother I began to put people & things above God & basically worshiped them as my idols.

By Fall 2005, I realized that I could not continue as a leader in my church, so I withdrew from leadership after sharing my sin with my pastor & a few other brothers. Eventually I decided to postpone indefinitely all plans for fulltime mission service. Later, after Jadon’s mother & I broke off our courtship (early last December), I discovered that she was pregnant!

This past year has been unbelievably difficult, not just because of the sin leading to Jadon’s conception but also because of my own stupid sin in continued bitterness, self-centeredness, & pride. In all of this I grieved our good God & spurned His goodness. I obviously hurt Jadon’s mother & her family more deeply than I can express. I hurt very, very many people. (Below is a letter I wrote to my boss which explains some of my situation; he graciously has NOT asked me to resign.)

I also hurt you, dear Saints. Even though you didn’t know it, my lack of holiness made me less able to serve you as a brother, & especially as a leader my sin brought shame on Christ’s body before the world. Please, please forgive me, especially when many of you were so sacrificial in your support of my journey toward overseas service.

If any of you are in the praying mood, I would be humbled if you would pray for the following:
1. for Jadon’s health & well-being, especially that he would grow up to know Jesus’ love far better than his father.
2. for Jadon’s mother & me, that we would re-learn how to be God’s joyfully obedient servants, for His glory & Jadon’s good. This is particularly challenging for us in the midst of physical tiredness: we both care for an active boy, & since I moved in with an uncle & aunt in order to be closer to Jadon (his mother lives with her own family), I have a new one-hour commute to work.
3. for my family & my local church, who have been incredibly supportive to Jadon & me, that they would have wisdom in giving me godly counsel & care.

Yes, while the whole process has been extremely difficult (& looks to be that way for a long time), there is GOOD news! Not only is Jadon a happy & healthy boy, but even more importantly, his parents have forgiveness & hope for wholeness in Jesus! God is an amazingly good God, isn’t He? He is good! He is good! He is good! He alone is worthy of our worship!

Please accept my apologies for letting you know this news by letter. I would have loved to be able to meet with each of you personally, but I thought it would be important to share this news (both good & bad) without further delay. Please let me know if you have any questions about what’s going on in my life. If you have the time, I’d also like very much to hear how you are doing.

By Grace,
Sidney Wu

PS: If you would like to see Jadon’s photos, please visit the website:
http://picasaweb.google.com/newsfromthewus/200608081207JadonFavorites03month
(Out of respect for Jadon's mother, her pictures are not included.)
PPS: If you’d like to visit & see Jadon in person, let me know!

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Re: Personal/Professional issues
September 8, 2006

Dear Dr. ______________:

I believe you are already aware that there have been drastic changes to my life’s course in the last year, most outwardly that I indefinitely postponed my plans for fulltime overseas mission service despite years of preparation toward this end. I recall that you had somehow mistakenly heard through the grapevine that the reason for this was an impending marriage, and I remember that we had a few chuckles about that. I may have mentioned that the reasons for my staying, rather, are personal problems I need to work out with God.

My hope from the very beginning of my joining faculty is that I have made clear to you and others in the Department, that I have considered it a very, very high honor to work among you in service to our Lord Jesus. I have considered it a God-sent gift, especially because I was actively en route to an academic center in Africa, to be able to work with residents and students to live out my calling to serve patients holistically. I signed on with whole-hearted agreement with our institution’s vision to carry out Jesus’ healing ministry. While I realize it is not a requirement to be a Christian to work in our University, I considered it a privilege to live and share the Gospel in a setting which supported it, and I may have been among the more vocal attendings in this regard. It is my hope and belief that in the workplace, I have shared the Gospel in a way that has been sensitive, ethical, and beneficial to our patients and staff, whatever their background or faith.

At 7:21AM on August 8, 2006, my son Jadon Mackay Wu was born. While an unspeakably joyful experience, it was the culmination to many months of both happy anticipation and inner anguish deeper than I had ever experienced. Jadon’s mother and I are thankful that he is a healthy boy, and we look forward to what God will accomplish in and through him (including through him to his parents). Though his mother and I continue to struggle with very, very complicated and serious issues, we are trying to work together with our families toward the end of each giving Jadon our individual best.

Jadon is NOT sin – this is a vigorously clear fact. God’s Word tells me he is a GIFT, and I treat him as a precious one from God’s hand.

But the events that led to his conception were indeed sin. Though outwardly my sin was fornication, deeper underneath was a life of pride and idolatry, and in all of it I was wrong – dead wrong, and my sin has hurt many people.

My offense was most deeply against our loving God, of course. I have asked His forgiveness, & He has graciously granted it in Jesus. He also continues to love me through helping me understand the roots of my sin, helping me work through its effects, & giving me a church and some close brothers to encourage & challenge me according to His holy standards. God's word assures me that this process is not punitive, but rather restorative, and indeed redemptive. Even in the last months I have been blessed with opportunities to serve His kingdom in non-leadership roles in my local church, in my family, with friends, & in our clinics. God has been too good to me.

Still, I know that I hurt others besides God. The mission boards I was appointed with (Serving In Mission/SIM, Global Life Enrichment Center, & Project MedSend) invested a considerable amount of time & other resources into me, & I let them down. (I discussed the nature of my sin with appropriate people in these organizations, & with the extension of their prayerful support, they accepted my resignations.) Several people gave me money before I ever formally asked for it; I returned or redirected their contributions according to their wishes. My family & my local church were all ready for my departure & were deeply praying for my readiness. Far more deeply than I can describe, I obviously also hurt Jadon’s mother & her family.

I realize that many would consider this a “personal” issue “irrelevant” to one’s professional life, but I see problems with such a dichotomy, especially when the Bible calls all of life ministry, and also when I am on faculty with a Christian university. I do not mean to say that every sin ought to be brought forth to the University level for some kind of public confession or trial. Nor do I think the University should send out any “moral police” to ferret out every wrong; I am thankful the University leaves this job in the Holy Spirit’s hands.

As a member of faculty, I know that my sin – particularly of such magnitude & such far-reaching ramifications – places an awful stain on the University, and for this, I ask your forgiveness. While it is my hope that I may continue as a wounded healer to serve Christ with renewed commitment to our University’s vision, I am ready to resign my appointment if you feel that my wrong deems so.

I am open to any questions you may have in case more detail about my past or present situation would serve you. I did plan to bring this before you much earlier in the winter, but at that time it was clear that some issues regarding Jadon’s life and care needed to be worked out first.

Yours Truly,
Sidney S.C. Wu, MD

2006年12月11日

最親愛的聖人和親愛的朋友們:

你們好嗎? 我祈禱你們過的好. 我知道我有很長時間沒有同你們中的許多人連絡. 我對沒有回覆你們中來信詢問我近況的人感到很抱歉. 從很多方面, 我覺得自己沒有辦法回覆…最初我覺得自己沒有語言和精力作出有意義的回覆. 當有了語言和精力, 我需要專注於同我的家人及教會分享.

當我寫這封信時, 我祈禱它會幫助你們了解我的生命中所發生的. 雖然有些我要分享的消息是壞消息, 我希望你們不介意我從好消息講起.

親愛的朋友們, 我是一個父親了! 在四個多月前, 我的兒子Jadon Mackay Wu 出生了:　6磅1.5盎司, 長19英吋(包括他暫時尖尖的頭). 藉著一位非常慈愛, 奉獻, 育哺的母親的幫助, 他已經長成一個非常健康快樂, 胖胖的有雙下巴的男孩子, 喜歡呀呀學語, 吃吃的笑, 跟對著有趣的臉微笑. 事實上, 他還沒有遇到過他不喜歡的臉! 他早已熟練于控制頭部運動, 踢着腿在床上一吋吋轉圈, 而且看起來很快就可以自己翻身了.

我要告訴你將這小孩子抱在懷中, 凝視他的臉是那麼的奇妙. 雖然我幾乎每天都在照顧他, 我仍不能肯定我已完全相信: “我是一個父親了? 而這個是我的兒子?!” 然而看著他在我的眼前成長, 我的感恩是難以言喻的. 當Jadon睡在我的胸前, 我也可以感受到他的溫暖…哇! 多珍貴的從天父來的禮物(詩篇127:3)!

很難理解為什麼神對我, 一個可怕的罪人, 如此的恩寵, 給了我如此美好的兒子. 同時也很難了解我同Jadon的母親閒依然存在著許多的痛苦掙扎, 我們所犯的通姦的罪只是許多讓我們不能考慮婚姻的問題之一. 這許多的問題, 是我們在尋求牧師的輔導後才勉強開始認知並嚐試解決的. 也許有其它我們還沒有發現的問題. 一件事是肯定的: 罪讓我們的問題(包括其他人的罪)變得更加的複雜.

你們中的大多數人都知道, 多年來我都在為海外醫療宣教作準備. 事實上, 我曾被三個宣教機構任命, 而且我去西非一所醫院工作的一切準備也已就緒. 你們中的很多人, 也對這一計畫很支持. 一切都就緒了…幾乎.

一切都就緒了…除了我的心. 在宣教的最後準備階段(從2005年五月起), 事實上, 是我人生中極為痛苦混亂的季節. 我還是決定繼續我的宣教計畫, 因為我知道這一直是我明確的目標, 而我們的神也當然的配得我的愛與服侍. 我當時的代禱信也反映了零星的從神來的力量與信心. 但是逐漸的, 我變的驕傲且自我為中心. 我開始專注於我自私的想法, 什麼是我所需要的, 在可悲的自我里, 我忽視了我們神的聖律. 特別是在我同Jadon母親的關係中, 我開始將其他的人和物放在神之上, 實質上我將他們當偶像來崇拜.

在2005年的秋天, 我認識到我不能在教會中繼續擔任領導, 應此在於牧師跟幾位弟兄分享了我的罪之後, 我從領導的位置引退. 最終我決定取消一切全職宣教的計畫. 之後, 我跟Jadon的母親結束了我們的交往(去年十二月初), 我發現她懷孕了!

過去的一年難以想像的艱難, 不僅僅是因為導致我們的孩子出生的罪, 也是應為我自己愚蠢的罪, 我繼續活在苦毒, 自我為中心, 以及驕傲里. 在一切的過程中, 我使我們的神憂心, 也常常拒絕他的美好. 我顯然對我孩子的母親和她的家人造成了難以形容的深刻傷害. 我傷害了非常非常多人. (以下在我寫給我上司的信中我也解釋了我的一些情況, 他也以他的寬容沒有要求我請辭.)

我也傷害了你們, 親愛的聖人. 雖然你們並不知情, 我的不聖潔導致我不能更好的作為弟兄服侍你們, 特別作為一個領導我的罪使基督的肢體在世上蒙羞. 懇請, 懇請你們原諒我, 特別是你們中很多人對我海外事工給予了無私的支持.

如果你們有禱告的意願, 如果你們可以為以下的事禱告, 我會十分感激:
1. 為Jadon的健康平安, 特別是他能在成長中認識神, 優於他的父親.
2. 也為我跟Jadon的母親禱告, 禱告我們能夠重新學習作神喜樂順服的僕人, 為了他的榮耀以及Jadon得益. 因為我們身體的勞累這變的特別的困難: 我們都要照顧一個活躍的男孩子, 為了離Jadon更近, 我搬去跟和叔叔嬸嬸同住(他的母親同她的家人住在一起), 我現在需要開一小時的車去上班.
3. 為我的家人跟我的教會, 他們對我跟Jadon給予了相當的支持, 禱告他們會有智慧給我從神來的輔導和關懷.

是的, 雖然這整個過程極為困難(而且看起來很長的時間裡還會如此), 但是還是有好消息! 不僅僅因為Jadon是個快樂健康的男孩, 更重要的是, 他的父母因着耶穌的完全而得到了赦免与希望! 上帝是何等的美好, 不是嗎? 他是好的! 他是好的! 他是好的! 唯有他才佩得我們的敬拜讚美.

請原諒我通過信件讓你們得知這個消息. 如果可能我也很希望能親自跟你們每人見面, 但我認為及時分享這個消息(好的同不好的)是很重要的. 如果你們有任何關於我生活的問題請告知我. 如果你們有時間, 我也非常希望知道你們過的怎麼樣.

靠著恩典,
吳加怡

又及: 如果你們想看Jadon的照片, 可以上網:
http://picasaweb.google.com/newsfromthewus/200608081207JadonFavorites03month
(為了尊重Jadon的母親, 她的照片沒有被包括.)
再及: 如果你們想親自來看望Jadon, 請告知我!

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關於: 個人/職業問題
2006年9月8日

敬愛的R________醫生:

我相信你已經發現在過去一年里, 我的人生發生了極大的變化. 特別是我全職海外宣教的計畫, 雖然準備了多年, 卻將無限期的延後. 我記得你因為多方的流傳, 誤解行期的推遲是因為將至的婚禮, 我記得我們還曾經為此嬉笑. 我大概提過我之所以留下來的原因, 其實是我需要時間與神解決一些我個人的問題

我希望在我最初於你們共事之際, 就已經向您以及部門的其他同事清楚表明, 能同你們一起侍奉我們的救主耶穌是我非常非常大的榮幸. 我一直將它看作是從神來的禮物.特別是我曾積極準備去非洲的一個學術中心, 以便可以同住院醫師及學生一起服侍病人,活出神對我的呼召. 我在簽約時全心贊同我們團體行耶穌治愈的服侍的理念. 當我了解到在我們學校工作並不一定要是基督徒, 而對我來說能在一個支持福音的環境中傳揚並活出福音是一種恩典, 而我應該是在傳揚福音上比較積極的主治醫師之一. 我希望也相信, 我在工作中感性的, 道德的, 令人受益的與病人及同事分享福音, 不論他們的背景與信仰為何.

2006年八月八日, 早晨7點21分, 我的兒子Jadon Mackay Wu出生了. 那是一種難以言喻的喜樂, 於此同時, 多月來積蓄的喜悅的期待, 內心的痛苦之深是我從未體驗過的. 我與Jadon的母親為他是個健康的男孩而感恩, 也期待看到神在他身上以及透過他所要成就的事 (包括透過他在他的父母身上要成就的). 雖然我同他的母親繼續在非常非常複雜嚴肅的問題里掙扎, 我們正同我們的家人一起為了分別給予Jadon我們各自最好的照顧努力.

Jadon不是罪 – 這是一個不容質疑的事實. 神的話告訴我們他是一個禮物, 而我也將他當成從神來的珍貴的禮物.

但導致他的受孕的事件確實是罪. 表面上我的罪是通姦, 但更深層的問題是一個自傲, 姦淫的人生, 這一切都是我的過錯 – 極大的過錯, 而且我的罪也傷害到很多人.

當然, 我最大的罪是觸犯了我們慈愛的神. 我已經請求他的赦免, 而他也仁慈的通過耶穌賜下赦免. 他也繼續的愛我: 幫助我了解我罪的根源, 引導我處理它的後果, 並給了我一個教會和一群親近的弟兄以神的聖潔標準鼓勵要求我. 神的話使我確信這個過程不是懲罰, 而是恢復, 更是救贖. 甚至在上個月, 我還得神的祝福在非領導的位置有侍奉的機會, 在教會, 在家裡, 在朋友閒, 在我們的診所. 神對我太好了.

而且, 我知道除了神, 我還傷害了其他人. 我所屬的宣教機構在我的身上投注了大量的時間及其它資源, 而我卻讓他們失望了. (我與機構中的相關人士討論了我所犯的罪, 而他們也以禱告於支持, 接受了我的請辭). 有些人在我正式要求之前就給了我經濟上的援助, 我已根據他們的意願將其退還或另作它用. 我的家人及教會都為我啟程做好準備, 並為我的預備作深切的禱告. 遠超過我可以形容, 我顯然也傷害了Jadon的母親和她的家人.

我了解很多人會認為這是一個 “私人”問題, 於一個人的職業生命 “沒有關係”. 但我認為這種區分是有缺陷的, 特別是當聖經將整個生命稱為事工, 而我也在一個基督教的大學任教. 我並不是說所有的罪都要被擺在全校範圍作公開的道歉或審判. 我也並不認為大學需要所謂的 “道德警察” 來揪出所有的過錯. 我為了大學將這項工作交在聖靈的手中而感恩.

作為教職員之一, 我知道我的罪 – 特別是有如此範圍及深遠影響的罪 – 使我們的學校蒙羞. 為此我請求你們的寬恕. 我希望可以繼續以一名受了殤的治癒者的身分來侍奉耶穌基督, 更新我對我們學院的理念的承諾, 於此同時如果你們認為有必要, 我也已準備好請辭我的任命.

如果對你有幫助, 我願意回答任何關於我現階段及上階段的細節問題. 我切實的計畫了早在冬季將這一切呈于你, 但當時一些有關Jadon出生和養育的問題需要首先得到解決.

你真誠的,
Sidney S.C. Wu, MD吳加怡醫生

Blessed Ian (a follow-up letter from our 12/2005 cousins' trip to the Grand Canyon)

Dearest Cousins:

[As I write this, I want you guys first to know a few things. First I want you to know that I write out of my WEAKNESS; the things I share are lessons I am still learning. Those of you who joined us for the trip to the Grand Canyon know that I felt (& feel) least worthy of having organized & led the trip. Second, I want it to be clear that I don't write as if I was the person who most cared for Ian during our trip; Anna & Austin worked hardest by far to care him.]

It's not easy taking care of our cousin Ian, is it?

Why not just come out & say it? He doesn't like to bathe. He doesn't appreciate a lot of the things I enjoy doing (like playing group games or exercising). He gets "stuck" on certain things that I just don't understand (coins, travel brochures) & can throw tantrums when he doesn't get his way. Having him around keeps me from being able to do some things I otherwise would like to do. Caring for him adds extra, tangible burden to my life's plans.

"BLESSED IS IAN..."
What I've been learning in the last few years, though, is that God's economy isn't much like the world's economy. Our Lord Jesus' very life & death attest to that fact. He flips upside-down our innate value systems, perhaps best stated in His words from the mountain:
"Blessed are the poor... Blessed are those who mourn... Blessed are the meek... Blessed are those who hunger & thirst... Blessed are the merciful... Blessed are the pure in heart... Blessed are the peacemakers... Blessed are those who are persecuted..." (Matthew 5:1-12).
If Jesus is among us now in Spirit, does He not add, "Blessed is Ian"? (I'll tell you what I mean in a minute...)

I look at the list of what Jesus tells us signifies blessing, & I say to myself, "What??!!! Aren't these things typically the very things we try to AVOID?"

Perhaps my strong reaction is because of how Jesus challenges my own life, my own values. "What does that mean about ME? Am I blessed?"

Yes, dear cousins, I AM blessed... but how? My health? My being American/Canadian? My degree? My getting to live in a beautiful place? My Taiwanese heritage? My ability to communicate? My medical degree? A lot of people certainly have encouraged me to think that these are blessings... so are they right?

Maybe. It isn't that I'm not thankful for each or that they haven't benefited me. Each has helped me in one way or another. But if I recognize them to be something they're not (as if they make me more valuable or lovable), or if I don't let them "die" & then disciple them to be used for God's kingdom (Luke 9:23), they can end up... well, damning.

When I was in a position to preach & teach in churches (not now), I had the sneaking suspicion that some people would pay attention only because I was a doctor, a so-called "upstanding member of society." So did my being a doctor help people to hear the Gospel? I'd have to say "perhaps," if they saw me as someone wholly submitted to Jesus, who happened to live that out in the vocation of medicine. More often, I'm very afraid, my being a doctor might have instead distracted from the Gospel message. Would these people have listened more, or less, carefully if Jesus Himself was speaking? Isaiah 53:2 tells us of Jesus, "He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him, nothing in his appearance that we should desire him." Was I speaking from a life totally discipled to Christ, following in His willingness for self-sacrifice? Jesus spoke to many & was murdered on the cross!

So then, who's more blessed: Ian or I? I honestly don't have the answer to that, because I know God has greatly blessed me in saving my life from sin.

But I do know that Ian is remarkably blessed. He comes before God with only child-like faith (just as we can, if we're humble enough to recognize it). Ian must rely on the help of others (just as we must, when we're humble enough to realize it). He trusts implicitly that his needs (which he cannot meet on his own) will be met (just as we are called to in humility).

To be sure, Ian has a few needs we don't have. He can't safely go around a new area on his own. He needs reminders to keep himself clean. He might make some people uncomfortable at parties.

But he also has the ability to teach us, in ways we cannot teach ourselves, how to live a simple life. To learn from him, we must humble ourselves just as the pious Pharisees & powerful Roman soldiers needed to if they wanted to learn from the lowly carpenter's son Jesus (Matthew 23:12). Ian, too, teaches us from his blessedness.

We can be blessed by Ian not only by learning from him, but also in caring for him. When we care for Ian, we learn to serve Jesus in ways we could not otherwise learn. When I read Matthew 25:31-46, I am challenged to serve Jesus among "the least of these brothers of mine," & it involves remembering that these "least" are in fact the ones Jesus calls MOST blessed.

When we get our new glorified bodies on the other side of eternity, & the curse of autism (oh yes it is a curse; because of Redemption God simply forces it to become a blessing for His children; Romans 8:28) is lifted from Ian's being, perhaps he'll be able to articulate all the things we'll have yet to learn. And together, along with the rest of our family, may we cry out together, "Yes Jesus, You had it right all along. Thank You for blessing us in ways You knew were best for us, in ways we ourselves would never have imagined."

And thank you, Ian.

God's grace is too awesome for words, isn't it, Dear Cousins?

Love,
Stephen
PS: Again, I'm sorry for taking so long to write.

Important announcement

January 27, 2006

Dearest Praying Friends & Family:

How are you? I pray that this letter finds you joyfully learning the lessons God has for you, for His kingdom's sake. From some of you I've heard pretty tough news; may the Lord specially show you His great mercy & grace. From some of you I've heard very, very happy news; praises to God!

It has been about 7 months since I last wrote to you en-masse regarding missions, & many of you know that after many years of preparation I was planning to depart from the U.S. this year. Your support through the years was invaluable to me, & I could hardly have ever deserved it. At very strategic times when life was hard, God used many of you to encourage me. Thank you very, very much.

All of your goodness to me makes this important announcement all the more difficult to make: at the beginning of last month I made the decision to cancel my plans for overseas service.

The decision was not made lightly. I discussed it with some close brothers, some pastors, and the staff of my mission boards, & it was clear that this was the best path for me to take at this time. Cancelling my plans for overseas service now is not only the best for me, but also is the best way to honor the ministry of each mission board & to glorify our holy God. Serving In Mission (SIM) & Evangelical Formosan Church's Global Life Enrichment Center (EFC/GLEC), & Project MedSend, while extending their prayerful support, have accepted my resignations from mission appointment.

My prayer is that there is no misunderstanding about the reasons for this decision. It certainly was NOT that I felt under-supported; on the contrary many of you made clear to me that you were behind me 100%, & the different organizations I worked with also graciously gave me full support. It also is NOT because I no longer feel mission work is important; rather, I know that it is vital to God's kingdom... our world yet needs to hear about Christ!

Rather, the reason for my withdrawal is because of the unreadiness of my HEART. Even though my financial, occupational, cultural, physical, language, family, & organizational preparations were all "in place," I had failed to guard my HEART against idolatry. I had turned away from worshiping the one, true, wonderful God, to worship other things, including my own fears & my own plans for life. From these sinful roots sprang forth other problems which further clouded my ability to serve & lead effectively in God's kingdom, & disqualified my service as a church leader per 1 Timothy. For this reason I stepped down from leadership in my local church (EFC & Living Water Christian Fellowship) months ago. Sadly, I was the one who had failed to submit my life to the holy goodness of Christ.

My offense was most deeply against our loving God, of course. I have asked His forgiveness, & He has graciously granted it in Jesus. He also continues to love me through helping me understand the roots of my sin, helping me work through its effects, & giving me a close band of brothers to encourage & challenge me according to His holy standards. God's word assures me that this process is not punitive, but rather restorative. Even in the last month I have been blessed with opportunities to serve His kingdom in non-leadership roles in my local church, in my family, with friends, & at work. God has been too good to me.

Still, I know that I hurt others besides God. The boards I was working under invested a considerable amount of time & other resources into me, & I let them down. Several people gave me money before I ever formally asked for it; I returned or redirected their contributions according to their wishes. My family & my local church were all ready for my departure & were deeply praying for my readiness.

I hurt you, too, in taking your loving support lightly as I failed to stand strong for God's kingdom as your representative.

Please forgive me for so deeply wronging you.

Yours Truly,
Sidney Wu

LOVE News photo #8

Where in the world is Niger?

LOVE News photo #7

Here I come Niger, with love!
尼日我來了，帶著愛！

LOVE News photo #6

Apparently Gabrielle, fluent in French & of 1/2-French descent, doesn’t much love my French acting. She heads to Niger this fall.
很顯然，講流利法文並有1/2法國血統的Gabrielle，不太喜歡我學的法國人。她今年秋季將出發去尼日。

LOVE News photo #5

Joking around with friends at church, a face only a mother could love
在教會同朋友們玩鬧，“只有媽媽才會愛”的臉。

LOVE News photo #4

A recent 5K race with friends
最近同朋友參加五公里長跑。

LOVE News photo #3

Receiving Love
Dale, a fellow missionary, prays for me after I shared my testimony in North Carolina
“接收愛” Dale, 一位傳教士弟兄, 在我於北卡羅來納州分享我的見證後爲我禱告。

LOVE News photo #2

Giving Love
At my high school alma mater helping to award a scholarship we started a few years ago
“給予愛” 在我以前的高中，幫助頒發我們幾年前開設的獎學金。

LOVE News photo #1

“Love is an ocean”
Laura and Charles Abavare, separated by an ‘ocean’ of love
“愛如海洋”Laura和Charles Abavare， 在愛的海洋的兩岸。

(the prayer letter that never was)

LOVE News
August 19, 2005 [though never sent out]
“Love never fails…” (1 Corinthians 13:8)

Dearly Beloved:
How are you? I hope & pray this letter finds you well, & that the holy love of Jesus transcends all that I know many of you are dealing with. Please let me know how you’re doing if I haven’t heard from you lately.

In case you need a reminder, TIME IS A’FLYIN!!!

Yes, it’s only been about 2 months since my last prayer letter, & no, I haven’t left the country just yet. It won’t be long before I head overseas though, so there’s lots to tell you! Wanna hear about it? Read on!

"WU FINDS TRUE LOVE!"
Love. People often talk about how hard it is to find, yet for some strange reason, I feel like lately I’ve been bombarded with it at every turn.

It’s not that I wasn’t looking for it. For those of you who know me best, you know that I’ve been looking a long time for love. Ever since junior high school & perhaps even earlier, I’ve thought about my future family – my future wife, my future children, & even my future grandchildren & great-great-grandchildren. I don’t think it was typical of boys at that age growing up, but I made my plans for future family & readied myself to romance a woman & win her heart.

And then I grew up. A few false starts, mistakes, & painful breakups forced me to rein in the passionate romance I longed to share, & God used these hard experiences to help me to see love – His love – with eyes of wisdom & integrity. Passion? Romance? Those had to be put on the back-burner for a time when it was clear that they could be shared with the holiness that God requires.

But in these last few months God has been kind of funny with me. In June while at a conference for giving spiritual care in the health setting (www.gomets.org), I bumped into Charles & Laura Abavare, a young couple working in the health field who desired to use their professions to God’s glory. Let me tell you: they have such a wild love story! Who would have thought that love would spring forth between a young Ghanaian man & a young white American nurse during her stint in Africa, just before he left for Germany? Who would believe that their love would be sustained as they were thousands of miles apart & decided for engagement by phone? Who could have known that their love would continue when Charles was back in Ghana & Laura back in America, despite their families’ mixed feelings? What about the international “prepaid calling card from God,” which lasted far beyond its advertised minutes for nearly a year, right up to the time they had arranged for Charles’ immigration to the U.S., & which worked ONLY when he called Laura’s number & not any other number? Who could fathom that???

Needless to say, as I sat there at our dinner table & listened to the Abavare’s soaring love story, my jaw dropped.

But the love stories didn’t end there. In these past two months I had the privilege of hearing several other wonderful love stories, especially as in July I attended another conference with one of my mission boards (Serving In Mission; SIM) in North Carolina. I got to hear the story of Daniel & Solene, whose romance years ago also spanned the Atlantic, but between the U.S. & France. Troy & Kim’s romance-by-correspondence spanned the Pacific between the U.S. & India. There was also Len & Jody Olson, whose rip-roaring romance took about two months between first date & engagement. Brad & Brenda Clark’s romance began when more than his welding torch started to spark when he came to fix her garage door! Tim & Cathi Emery’s romance evidently continues on strong, as they just had their 8th beautiful child about five months ago!

For someone who loves even the idea of love, these true love stories were wonderful to hear! I had found TRUE LOVE!

I hear you saying, “Hey Sid, stop messing around with these misleading titles! What about your own love story, anyway?”

You know, for a kid who started thinking about his future family over 15 years ago, I oftentimes wonder about it myself. But when I listen to others’ love stories, meditate on all the instances of God’s wondrous goodness toward me, & see God’s sovereign creativity with His children, I don’t worry about it.

In fact, when Charles Abavare finished recounting his & Laura’s love story and after my bugged-out eyes returned into my face & my open-mouthed incredulity waned, I slapped his back & loudly declared, “Charles, YOU GIVE ME HOPE!”

Yes, God in His greatness & goodness indeed gives me hope for my own love story. In fact, when I remember that God IS love (1 John 4:7), I realize that my own love story has already begun. Will there be a wife in this love story? I hope & pray that there will be, & I prayerfully prepare for the day when I meet her, when both the passion & wisdom of God’s brand of love would serve & woo (or is it “Wu”?) her. She would be a precious gift from the One who loves me more than any other, for there is no greater love than that Jesus died for me (John 15:13).

But whether or not I marry, I’ve already found Love. More accurately, Love has found me. He crossed far more than oceans to find me. He tells His people, “I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore with lovingkindness I have drawn you” (Jeremiah 31:3).

Yes indeed, I have been drawn in by Love.

"NIGER: HERE I COME!"
Part of God’s lovingkindness to me has been His helping me to come to a decision on where I will be headed next summer. For nearly the last year I have been praying about the possibility of heading to Niger, primarily because of its spiritual & physical needs, & the presence of a residency training program at the mission hospital there. And last month, at the SIM conference mentioned earlier, I found out that there remains an opening for a physician there!

Let me tell you a little about Niger. The largest in West Africa, Niger is a country landlocked on the southern side of the Sahara Desert. About eleven million people of multiple ethnicities inhabit that dry land. Independent from French colonial rule in 1960, the nation is still fraught with problems. Recent droughts, locust infestations, & resulting starvation lately have brought Niger to news headlines. It is the second poorest country in the world, with at least 90% of people barely living hand-to-mouth. There are fewer than 1 physician for every 30,000 people. Infants die at a rate more than 18 times greater than in the U.S., and life expectancy was recorded before the famine at about 41 years. Besides physical poverty, spiritual poverty is rampant: while about 90% call themselves Muslim, fewer than 1% know and follow Jesus.

I have often asked that God would use me where there is the most need, & I believe you will agree that Niger certainly has needs of staggering magnitude. My hope & prayer is that God would use me to serve Him in Niger in the areas of health care, evangelism, & community development. My desire to stay in academic medicine is for the long-term purpose of training up other physicians to have God’s vision for the world, and to help train them to bring up generations of believers after them who will care for the physical & spiritual needs which surround the SIM Galmi Hospital.

Obviously there will be much preparation required before taking off for Niger. There will be continued cultural & theological training, financial preparations, keeping my medical skills up-to-date, physical preparation, spending time with family & friends, & of course the heart preparation of loving the One True God above all, & relying on Him to complete the great tasks He has before me.

"LOVE REQUESTS"
Let me assure you: the tasks before me are so great, they are indeed impossible for me to do at all without our loving Father. Embarking on this move will be unlike any mission trip I’ve ever experienced. Much of our good God’s love for me has come through each of you, in your prayers and supportive encouragement. Would you please continue to be instruments of God’s love to me as you pray for the following?
- wisdom with time management. In this year before going to fulltime language school next summer, I will be busy reading many important books on culture & theology, learning some French, traveling around to share God’s vision for mission, raising support, and spending meaningful time with friends & family. Please pray that I would love the Lord above all, & that my toil for His kingdom – even in sharing the Gospel & serving the poor here & now in my work, church, & community – would come from the quiet peace of knowing His love for me & His world.
- my team-building. My ministries have ALWAYS been possible only with the help of others, & this fact will continue in my ministry in Niger. While my greatest need by far is for your prayers, there is undoubted need for financial support as well. For my first 5-year term (summer 2006 onward), my monthly support need (including basic living costs, retirement, & medical insurance) comes to about US$2300 per month, & my one-time outgoing expenses amount to about US$25,000 (including travel, language school, medical supplies, & vehicle). Would you prayerfully consider joining me in God’s ministry to Niger with your prayer & financial support? If you’d like to chat more about my ministry or would like me to speak to your church group, I’d be happy to arrange that. My hope & prayer is that this mutual ministry of support & encouragement would continue both now & when I go overseas. My own home sending church, the Evangelical Formosan Church in Riverside, California, has me sharing about world mission every month, & in October I will preach (in Taiwanese!) about the Lordship of Christ for all believers. Certainly much prayer is needed for that!
- a ministry partner. For many years I have prayed for someone with whom I could go overseas together for ministry. Now that departure is just around the corner, I find myself thinking, “Wow, it’d sure be nice to pray & do all these preparations such as team-building, theological training, & learning French together with someone headed overseas with me.” Before you say, “Hey Sid, that sounds like a wife!,” let me inform you that my longstanding vision for this partner has been for a brother-in-Christ, & that perhaps we could go overseas together with our families. Recently at the SIM conference, I met others who are in a situation much like what I’ve prayed for. One pair of couples are college friends preparing to serve in Burkina Faso. Another pair of couples just returned from Ethiopia where the fruitfulness of their ministry was a result of how their gifts & talents complemented each other’s. When I met these couples, I was encouraged to pray more fervently for my own partner, & even to ask your help in praying for this person. Perhaps God is preparing one of you to join me! Or, perhaps I’ll only meet this person when I’m finally on the field in Niger. In any case, your prayer for this would be greatly appreciated! And if you insist on praying for my wife, I certainly won’t turn that down! (Many of you seem to pray & prod for this no matter whether I ask for it or not!) Ha!

Seriously though, I am thoroughly indebted to you for your love. Thank you so much for your support. Please let me know how I may be of support to you as well. May we live each day deeply knowing that God’s love has FOUND us, & may the world around us see it shine clearly through.

Constrained by His LOVE
(2 Corinthians 5:14), Sid Steve Wu

"SID'S KIDS"
-Patrick (13) explaining why he’s waiting until he gets married to have sex: "At my age it's, like, impossible to get a job."
-Tiffany (4) while pointing at my pimples: “Dr. Wu, you have a lot of ‘owies’ on your face"
-To the question “Why do you have a nose?,” Jarnell (3) replied: “For boogers.”

小吳新聞
“愛是永不止息。。。” （哥林多前書13：8）
2005年8月19日
Sidney.wu@sim.org (注意：我新的Email住址)

親愛的被愛的大家:
你們好嗎？我希望也祈禱收到信的你們一切安好，而主耶穌基督的愛能淩駕於你們所面對的種種。如果我最近都不曾聽到你的消息，請讓我知道你的近況。
萬一你需要一點提醒，時間飛逝！！！
是的，繼我上一封代禱信只過了兩個月。然而，我還沒有離開美國。
但是離我出國的日子已經不遠了，所以有很多是要告訴大家。想聽嗎？那就往下看吧。

小吳找到了真愛！
愛。有些人說它如何難以找尋，然而因爲某些奇異的原因，我覺得自己最近在生命的每一個轉角都被愛包圍。
並不是我自己沒有在尋求它。對那些最瞭解我的人來講，你們知道我從很久前就開始尋求愛。從我上國中，甚至是更早之前，我就曾想象我未來的家庭 – 我未來的太太，我未來的孩子們，甚至是我未來的孫子孫女，曾孫子曾孫女。我想這在同齡的男孩中並不尋常，但是我已經規劃了我未來的家庭，也準備給一個女人浪漫，贏得她的心。
而後我長大了。一些過早的開始，其間的錯誤，與痛苦的分手強迫我從我一直向往的愛情中抽離, 而神也使用這些痛苦的經歷來幫助我看到愛 – 他的愛 – 透過充滿了智慧與正直的雙

眼。那激情呢？那浪漫哪？當它們在與神所要求的聖潔不相融是，它們就必須要被擺在後面。
但在過去的幾個月中，上帝對我有些詼諧。在六月，一個關於在醫療領域給予靈性關懷的討論會中(www.gomets.org)，我認識了Charles和Laura Abavare, 一對在醫療領域工作，並渴望用他們的專業來服侍神的年輕夫婦。讓我來告訴你: 他們的愛的故事是如此的瘋狂。誰會想到，愛會在一個年輕迦納男人跟一個年輕的美國白人女護士間，在她在非洲做短暫工作停留，而他卻剛要離開去德國時萌芽？誰會相信他們的愛經歷了幾千英里的阻隔，電話中決定的婚約而得以維繫。誰又會知道他們的愛會在Charles回到迦納，Laura回到美國，雙方家人持混雜意見的時候繼續。還有那張“從神來的預付電話卡，”在超過了使用時間後還持續了將近一年，直到Charles移民來美國爲止，而且只在Charles撥打Laura的號碼是才能使用。這些誰又能瞭解呢？？？
不必說，當我座在晚餐桌前聽著Abavare不尋常的愛的故事時，我的下巴都合不攏了。
但愛的故事並沒有到此結束。在過去的兩個月中我有幸聽到了其他幾個美好的愛的故事。特別是在七月我跟我的福音傳教會之一（Serving in Mission; SIM）到北卡羅來納州參加另一個討論會。我聽到了Daniel與Solene，在幾年前同樣跨越了大西洋，美國與法國間的浪漫。Troy與Kim相應的跨越了太平洋，美國與印度間的浪漫。還有Len和Jody Olson,他們閃電式的愛讓他們從第一次約會到定婚只經歷了兩個月的時間。Brad在幫Brenda Clark修理車庫門的時候，蹦出火花的不只是他的熔接槍，他們的愛情也開始了。Tim與Cathi Emery間的愛顯然穩固的持續著，因爲他們五個月前剛生下了他們第八個美麗的孩子。
對一個連愛的概念都愛的人來說，能聽到這些真實的愛情故事是如此的美好！我找到了真愛。
我聽到你在講，“嘿加怡, 不要總是用這種題目來誤導我們！那你自己的愛情故事呢？“
要知道，對一個早在超過15年前就開始想象他未來家庭的孩子來說，我自己也常常這樣想。但當我聽到別人的愛情故事，默想上帝臨在我身上的奇妙美好，看到神在他孩子身上全然的創造力，我就不爲此擔心。
事實上，當Charles Abavare 講完他與Laura的愛的故事，而我突出的眼球回到眼眶，那令我合不攏嘴的驚訝也漸漸退卻，我拍著他的背大聲宣告, “Charles, 你給了我希望！”
是的，神的偉大與美好的的確確給了我對自己愛的故事的希望。事實上，當我想起神就是愛（約翰一書1：7），我瞭解到我的故事早已開始了。在我的故事裏會有一位太太嗎？我希望也祈禱會有這麽的一天，我爲了遇見她的那一天用禱告來預備我自己，當上帝的愛中來的熱誠與智慧讓我能夠服侍她，追求她。她會是從比任何人都愛我的神那裏來的珍貴禮物，因爲世間沒有比耶穌爲我死更偉大的愛（約翰福音15：13）。
無論我將來是否結婚, 我已經找到了愛。更確切地說，是愛找到了我。他穿越了比海洋更遙遠的距離找到了我。他告訴我們，“我已永遠的愛，愛你，因此我以慈愛吸引你”。
是的，我已經的的確確被愛所吸引。

尼日：我來了！
上帝的慈愛幫助我決定了我明年夏天要去的地方。我去年幾乎一整年都在爲去尼日的可能性禱告，主要因爲那裏靈性與物質的需要，以及當地福音醫院所提供的住院醫師的培訓課程。上個月，在我剛剛提到過的SIM討論會上，我獲悉那裏有一個醫生的空缺。
讓我來告訴你一些關於尼日的事。作爲西非最大的國家，尼日地處內陸，位於撒哈拉沙漠的南部。這片乾燥的大地上居住了一千一百萬不同族裔的人。最近發生的乾旱，蝗蟲的侵襲所導致的饑荒，使尼日在近來的新聞頭條上出現。它是全世界第二窮困的國家，90%的人民過著勉強溫飽的生活。平均每三萬民衆才有不到一個醫生。嬰孩的死亡率比美國高18倍，此次饑荒前統計的預期平均壽命是41歲。除了物質的窮困，屬靈的匱乏也廣泛的蔓延：90%的人稱他們自己是回教徒，只有不到1%的人知道並跟隨主耶穌。
我常常向主祈求他會將我使用在最需要的地方，我相信你也會同意尼日的確是有著難以衡量的需要。我的盼望與祈求是主會在尼日在醫療，福音，以及社區建設各方面使用我。我之所以選擇醫學學術研究，是希望可以長期致力於爲主造就其他有負擔的醫生，幫助他們來造就下一代的信徒，繼他們之後會繼續關懷SIM駐Galmi醫院的物質與精神的需求。
在去尼日前顯然還有許多準備的工作。我將會繼續進行文化以及神學方面的課程，經濟上的籌備，我也需要保持自己醫療技術的現時性，做身體上的準備，找時間與家人和朋友相處，當然更要預備我的心來愛唯一的真神，要靠著他來完成他擺在我前面的衆多的工作。

愛的委託
我向你們保證：擺在我面前的工作是艱巨的，是我絕對不可能離開我們慈愛的天父全部單獨完成的。著手與這一決定跟我之前經歷的福音短宣不同。我們天父對我的愛，很多都是通過你們的禱告與鼓勵傳達給我。是否可以請你們繼續作上帝愛的器皿，繼續爲我爲以下事項禱告呢？
- 時間管理的智慧。今年，在下個暑期全職進入語言學校前，我將會忙於閱讀很多有關文化以及神學方面的重要書籍，學習法文，去各地分享上帝傳播福音的意象，徵召援助，與家人跟朋友有意義的分享時間。請禱告我會愛神勝過一切，爲了他的國度辛勞 – 即使是此時此地，在我的工作，教會，即所在的社區中傳播福音，爲貧困的人服務 – 這一切都會是來自於知道了他對我的愛，他的國度而得來的平安。
- 我的團隊建設。我的服侍一直以來都是因爲大家的幫助才得以成就，這個事實在我在尼日的服侍中也不會改變。我最最需要的是你們的禱告，但毫無疑問的我也需要經濟上的援助。在最初的五年的任期裏(從2006暑期開始)，我每月的需要（這包括了基本的生活所需，退休金，醫療保險）總計約兩千三百美金，以及一次性所需（包括旅行，語言學校，醫療器材，當地的交通工具）兩萬五千美金。請你是否能禱告考慮給與我禱告與經濟上的支援，同我一起參與上帝的事工？如果你想跟我討論我的事工，或是要我去你的教會演說，我會很樂意做出安排。我的希望與禱告是想要這相互支援及鼓勵的事工在現在直至我出國之後一直持續下去。差遣我的教會, 臺灣福音教會恩聯分會，每月都由我分享全球福音傳播的資訊，我將在十月（用台語）傳講主耶穌基督于所有信徒的主權。非常需要你們爲此禱告。
- 一位共同服侍的同伴。多年來我一直爲一位可以共同出國服侍的同伴禱告。現在離開的日子就在眼前，我發現自己會想，“哦，如果可以跟一位要共同出國服侍的同伴一起禱告，並作其他如神學及法文課程的準備工作那會多好。”在你要說，“嘿加怡，聽起來像是位太太”前，讓我先告訴你，我多年來希望的同伴是一位主內的弟兄，而我們可以帶我們的家庭一起出國。最近在SIM候選人的討論會上，我遇見了與我禱告類似的情況。有兩對夫婦是大學時的朋友，正在一起準備去Burkina Faso服侍。另外兩對剛從衣索比亞回來的夫婦，他們的服侍在那裏，因著他們天賦和才能的互補，結出了豐盛的屬靈果實。看到這些夫婦，激勵我爲服侍的同伴更熱心的禱告，甚至也請你們爲著那個人禱告。也許上帝正預備你們中的某一個人來參與我的事工！也許我將在到了尼日之後才會遇到這位同伴。無論怎麽樣，我會很感激你們可以爲此禱告！如果你一定堅持要爲著我將來的太太禱告，我當然也不會拒絕！（無論我是否要求，你們中的很多人都在禱告或催促此事！）哈！
不過，認真地講，你們的愛讓我虧欠良多。非常感謝你們的支援。也請告訴我，我可以如何成爲你們的支援。願我們在活著的每一天裏，深深知道是神的愛尋到了我們，也願我們身邊的世界能看到這愛明白的顯現。
爲他的愛所激勵（歌林多後書5：14）！
吳加怡

小吳小孩（一）
Patrick (13)在解釋爲什麽他要等到婚後才進行性行爲時說：“在我的年紀，是，好像，不可能找得到工作的”。
小吳小孩（二）
Tiffany (4) 指著我的青春痘說，“吳醫生，你的臉上有好多‘痛痛’”。
小吳小孩（三）
在被問到“爲什麽你有鼻子”時，Jarnell (3) 答：“給鼻屎用的。”

如果你們需要我之前的代禱信：
www.sidneywu.blogspot.com
(由張簡頁翻譯)

FIRST ENTRY: "TO ALL READERS..."

Hi there, Reader:

You must be either incredibly bored or incredibly gracious to be reading this blog. I still don't know what "blog" means or what it's etymology is, though I suspect it's short for "web log." Who knows? I'm starting this because a few friends have suggested it, especially that I would make my public prayer letters more accessible to people.

Yeah, I'm a missionary, at least I'm preparing to be one, & God has been very gracious with me in adopting me as His child & putting me in His kingdom's service.

My favorite Bible passage follows: "Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5: 7,8). Yes, Christ died for me waaaaaaay before I ever repented or even knew He or I existed. His love for me precedes even my existence. And because of His love, I live.

Here's what I recently prayed when writing my latest prayer letter (2005 June 3):
"Dear God, please use this letter to be a blessing to Yourself & to all its readers. Guide me in writing it, & help my ideas to flow in a manner that clearly honors You. Above all I desire that its readers would be encouraged to find all of their satisfaction in You alone, & that You would be glorified not just in the words of this letter but even more so in the lives transformed by Your message of grace through me. In Jesus’ Name, Amen."

That prayer also applies to this whole blogging thing. May Jesus be praised.

Humbly Yours,
Sidney Stephen Chiayee Wu

(All previous newsletters were subsequently uploaded)

Snap photo #7

Visiting the "Z" early February
Pastor Jim Ziervogel, a long-time missionary pastor & researcher of Chinese peoples, recently went to be with the Lord after a long battle with Parkinson's Disease 
二月初探望“Z” Jim Ziervogel牧師曾長時間致力與華人的傳教與研究。在長期與帕金森綜合症作戰後，最近歸回主裏。

Snap photo #6

Visiting old friends in Mexico late May
Our local church has had a relationship with Pastor Samuel & Ernestina Garcia in Ensenada since 1996 
五月底在墨西哥看望老朋友 我所在的教會從1996年開始，與在Ensenada的Samuel牧師和Ernestina Garcia(師母)一直有聯繫。

Snap photo #5

May GLEC Prayer meeting 
五月GLEC的禱告會

Snap photo #4

"Studying" with nephew Nathan 
跟外甥Nathan一起“學習”

Snap photo #3

Meet the family: Brother-in-law Eric, sister Ruth, father Paul holding nephew Nathan, & mother... Grace! 
我的家人 姐夫Eric, 姐姐Ruth, 父親Paul抱著外甥Nathan, 和母親 。。。Grace!